You may ask why...Even if you don't...I'm going to tell you.
Reason 1: Way too much Diet Mountain Dew today.
Reason 2: My husband is at Scout Camp until Saturday. I don't sleep without him. Some nights I think, man...Tim needs to stop a.) hogging the bed. b.) snoring c.) kicking the covers on to me. d.) taking all the covers away. However, after 12 years, I still find my king sized bed very lonely when he's gone. And although I am so glad that my husband is a priesthood honoring man who is fulfilling his calling and being a good, strong Scout leader...I miss him. A lot.
Reason 3: Tomorrow, I am hosting a baby shower. WHAT?!? I have never hosted a baby shower, much less been to one. Ever. I hate them with every fiber of my being. More than the dentist. That's a lot. So, I have spent the last week making mustache games, making mustache chocolates, trying to figure out what the heck people do at these things and now realizing (in the middle of the night) in the midst of all my planning...I have forgotten to buy the mother to be a gift. Holy bananas. Really? Thank heavens WalMart is open 24 hours...and that I have a stash of baby ick that I've been collecting...just in case. Also, I feel sick because while making chocolate mustaches, I've tasted far too many and now am feeling quite ill.
Reason 4: I forgot to turn off the water outside before it got dark. Tim has all the flashlights with him. And....I'm pretty sure that there is some homicidal maniac (cue Aaron Hernandez jokes here) waiting outside to kill me. And yet, I don't want to flood my poor plants. Whatever, it's supposed to be super hot tomorrow, they'll be fine, right?
Reason 5: Because I've been so busy planning a baby shower, teaching sharing time, teaching singing time and working a full time job, my house is a DISASTER. AND...I have company coming in less than a week. To stay. Sigh. All night dish washing and laundry marathon anyone?
Reason 6: I am homesick. Now, I understand...I don't have a hometown. And the places that my family lives are most certainly not home to me. However, I have lived very close to my little brother for a few months...and then they moved away. And I hate it. I hate my family all being somewhere else. I hate that my brothers are all in one place and my parents are in another place. And I hate that we all have lives that prevent us from having a big family reunion. And I miss my nephew. I miss all of my nieces and nephews, but this one...well, he lived close for a long time...and I spent a lot of time with him...and well, I miss him.
Reason 7: My biggest fear is that I'll trip in the night and break my face and there will be no one to take me to the emergency room...which I wouldn't want to go to anyways. I would rather have a broken face than to have to pay the same doctor 14 different times for one stupid 3 hour visit. I mean seriously, you spent 10 minutes with me and now you think you have the right to charge me hundreds and hundreds of dollars for your 10 minutes? Buddy, you owe me for 3 hours. Let's just call it even, right?
Reason 8: I'm typing this stupid blog.
Now, I'm going to attempt to sleep...but will probably end up lying in bed playing Candy Crush Saga on my phone until it dies and my eyeballs fall out. Serious. Don't make fun of me tomorrow if I have no eyeballs. I'll be super offended.
Good night.
Good night.
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